A Perfect Exorcism: I smite thee in His honour; uh huh, oh yeah, really?

A Perfect Exorcism

God's deliverance, His merciful intervention in our lives, His grace, His benevolence, is not something that we're ignorant about. We have witnessed many instances, at least one if not for many, where His chosen men working for Him to help the lost find the path to the Lord.

Now, having all that being said, I stumbled upon this video while I was watching some videos covering paranormal experiences and similar stuff. I started listening to the lady in this video who was said to be possessed by the grand daddy of all evil, "The Lucifer," himself (or herself; remember, angels had no sex?).

It was pretty interesting, but soon took a form of ridiculous advertising technique. Of course, all of this sounded so funny to me, and NO, I didn't have goosebumps at all (sorry, I haven't mastered the art of raising my hair on the arms, armpits and ahem other parts, at will or as I please). Come on, check out some of the parts of the video that I have marked, and see for yourself how funnier can it get.

The Hell Advertisement Corp.: Pastor/Underworld deal

[11:07] Why is it that you don't like Synagogue, Church of All Nations? (the pastor asks, as if Devil had some problems, specifically, with this church)

[11:10] This girl has been following Prophet T.B. Joshua since 1998. (Oh yeah, now Lucy boy is into a bit of advertising Mr. Prophet T.B. Joshua; word of mouth counts eh? oops...word of spirit)

[11:28] She will watch Emmanuel TV the whole night and we cannot operate (says the girl, oops I mean Lucifer and his legion who possessed her; uh-uh it ain't the girl talking)

[11:44] When she watches the prophet, what happens to you and your colleagues? (the pastor asks)

and the possessed, so alleged, says, "We can't see, we can't walk, we can do nothing" (We can't shit, we can't piss, we can't we can't yada yada cuz "PROPHET" T.B. (Tuberculosis?) Joshua is an armour of God himself)

[11:52] Which prophet does she watch? (ooo God, this pastor is so desperate to hear his name over and over and over again)

She answers in a nearly perfect Heavy-Metal-type scream, "T.B. Joshua" (this reminded me of the vocalist when he sings, "I'm on a highway to hell")

[11:53] What is in Prophet T.B. Joshua that is destroying you people? (yeah, the pastor, desperately)

[11:58] He is light (Ahem ahem ahem, Holy Moly, Jesus and Joshua doesn't quite rhyme to be called the, "light". Lucifer, in Latin, means, "bringing light," by the way. So Lucifer would sound more appealing if someone had to chose between Joshua and Luci. No, I am not tempted at all, but I haven't had anyone else apart from Jesus, as my light)

[12:21] We put a snake inside her (says, the Legion inside her. Sorry, but it sounds like, ahem, suggests me something ahem else? Porn-ish ahem. Snake inside her huh? That's definitely EVIL)

and the pastor asks, "What is the purpose of the snake?" (No, you're wrong, we don't plan to use the snake for venom extraction)

The possessed says: It is a part of Lucifer in her; we can locate her everywhere (Hmm... part of Lucifer, like a tail? Okay, that's fine, but what about the, "locating," shit? Is the realm of unholy ground, the hell, updating its ways of operation with sophisticated gadgets, like Lucifer's personal GPS tracker. Sounds like, Lucifer, likes to radio snake tag the possessed).

[12:59] What happens to you people when she prays with Emmanuel TV? (Oh yeah, I feel so hot cuz the pastor is so smoking hot, and I get random surprising orgasms...Hallelujah)

[13:45] she drops down and poof, the evil departs (Looked to me like the pastor held some mysterious device to suck out, "the million," "the legion," out of the possessed in a split second...[If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood...Who ya gonna call (ghostbusters) NO damn it, it's Emmanuel TV]

What do you take home from this?

Well, I didn't mean to laugh and look down at this video, though that's what I did, but I truly feel it was all preplanned and scripted. She was definitely an actor, and so was the pastor (not by profession, but perfected by practise).

Many might hate me for this, but come on people, open your eyes and see. A possessed being so conversational, so patient with the pastor? Yeah, agreed with the fake angry face, but you can do that too with a little bit of practise, can't you?. Yeah, I can do the "GROOWWWWL," too, and even better.

Eating soil ain't that big deal, moreover she didn't eat even a spoonful of it. I have seen people eating paper and chalk. Does that mean they all are possessed? We have many mentally diseased conditions that would even send some chills down Lucifer's spine (Sorry Lucy. Don't come after me for this cuz I don't like to go to Prophet T.B. Joshua, cuz 1) He is too far, 2) He is on Youtube, and I have bad internet connection, so you probably won't like buffered exorcism, and 3) HE IS A FAKE ASS)

There might be, should be, and have to be, genuine evangelism and prayers at work, but I have a hard time digesting this video. What do you think?